31 July 2008

It's Summer

Yes, it has been summer for a long while. But for me it is just beginning. I leave in a few hours via train to the Bay area. Saturday is Vineman!
I am not as stoked as I would like to be because I have not been able to run much since I twisted my foot 3 weeks ago on our shuttle adventure. Though I did do 45 minutes this morning and it felt okay. Not great, but okay. We'll see how 26.2 miles go! The aerobars are already on my bike....
I'll do my best to send some updates.

28 July 2008

Mountaineerzz

I've been wanting to hit up a Mountaineerzz (a Midnight Ridazz off-shoot) ride for months and it finally worked out.

There is a car party at our house these days while fellow Swarm!ers travel the world. I picked out one of the motorized contraptions Friday night to hit up Orange 20 for a new cog (20 from 22) for the single-speed 29er and grab Megan and the burritos to head to Max's birthday in the South Bay.

Going to the South Bay is like a vacation. We were suppose to ride road in the am so I could test out the aerobars I am borrowing, but instead we hung out at REI and Whole Foods. After picking up Max we drove up to the second meeting point in Brentwood to meet the crew who rode to the ride. There were eleven of us, four on mountain bikes and the rest on cross bikes.

Route
We started up the now infamous Mandeville Canyon Drive to Mandeville fire road to 'Nike'. From here we hit dirt Mulholland to the Broken arrow single-track back to Mulholland. Then a new to me single track that I don't remember the name of and then fire road up to 'the Hub'. Max, Paul and I split off and took the Backbone single-track back to Brentwood while the more epic ride continued west toward the ocean.

The sun is obscured as the mist from the ocean consumes the mountains


Max and Paul descend toward the city

Backbone as it approaches Will Rogers State Park

This was a good mix of transversing and single track over four hours. Wish I had the cross bike set up to do the entire ride, but overall it was great with the single speed mountain bike (ssmtb?) as I prepare for those 100 mile mountain bike races coming up. And always fun to meet riders who see bicycles as transportation and media for adventure. Thanks everyone.

22 July 2008

yo Los Angeles

yo Los Angeles,
I love you. I never thought I would, but these last five years have been fantastic. Especially the bike riding. I remember when LA Critical Mass was the only ride and it started at 5th and Flower and was mostly messengers. Then came More Than Transportation 1, 2, 3 and 4. By 2005 we had Bike Summer. Then Midnight Ridazz blew up and we have more groups and rides then I can keep track of. Each passing day I am enthralled by the number of people on bikes. The people are here, but where is our city? What are you doing?

Metro Board tonight passed the half cent sales tax proposal for November, but a huge chunk of the money is for highway widening. And they refused to allocate any specific amount (1% was requested) for cyclists and pedestrians.

I don't want LA to be Portland. That's why I live here. But can I have a little Portland in my LA? How about some Copenhagen? I'd even settle for some Oslo.

Here are some articles I've read this week that kept me motivated. Enjoy.

Crimanimalz are taking over

LA Times: Two death-defying transit stunts: biking on freeways and walking across the street

New bike lanes spotted around LA

Councilman Labonge, Europe and Bikes

We're here. We ride. Get used to it.

Highway Funding: The last bastion of socialism in America

21 July 2008

You have to be a jock or a skater. You can't be both.

Those were the words of my best friend, Mike McNamee, the summer before Junior High. He has an older brother and sister so I figured him an expert in the matter. I played sports and was good at them, but my heart was in skateboarding and BMXing. So who am I? Luckily not long after that I discovered hard core music where you could wear running shoes, be fit and still be against the status quo. I was stoked.

Now 15 years later I still cannot very easily define myself through the events I do. When the girlfriend tells people I am triathlete I cringe. No way! I just happened to do them. Besides, I have bike handling skills and hate training. I'm also called a roadie, but I've been dropped in CatV races (explaining to the girlfriend why I am in the beginner category despite spending my life riding a bike is a whole other funny situation). Ultra-endurance cyclist? I've never done any of the RAAM qualifiers solo. Fixed gear freestyler? Yawn.

A photographer from Bicycling magazine was in our house the other day and he asked what kind of riding we do. 'Uhhhhhhh, commuting? And mountain biking. Single speed too. And some racing. And cross a bit. Double centuries? Yeah, we've all done a few. And I ride fixed.'

I am not going through any sort of existential crisis related to my upcoming 30th birthday, but merely going through the curiosity I have about why I do what I do. I have six bikes. Five of them are ridden regularly. I just love bike riding and am easily bored?

Some schedule updates:
HooDoo 500 is not happening. Nicolas is injured, Brian is poor and Jack(the one who's front wheel flies off) is track racing.

8.02 Vineman full-iron (triathlon)

My first two mountain bike races, six days apart:
8.31 Shenandoah 100
9.06 Tahoe-Sierra 100

Should I put a shock on my rigid single-speed? Anyone know someone over at Fox? They have a sweet 29er shock.
And to get stoked: Sick Of It All

14 July 2008

JPL Red Box shuttle ride

I got the idea for this adventure in the Spring when we rode out and back on Gabrielino. Lots of guys 'shuttle ride' this route. They meet at the bottom, pile into one truck, drive to the top, ride down and then drive back to the top for the first truck. Four additional motor vehicle trips on the narrow and windy Angeles Crest highway. Could we do this human powered without being irritatingly self-righteous?

(Cole took this photo. If you look close you can see the shadow from his mustache)

Easy. A group rides road 30 miles up Angeles Crest to Red Box (about 5000 ft elevation) towing mountain bikes. Another group trail runs 15 miles to Red Box. At the top group one passes the mountain bikes to group two who then ride the 15 miles of single track down to JPL.

To start I was up from 3am on 2 hours sleep and Max had stayed up the entire night. Brian rode out from El Segundo on his mountain bike (30 miles) and we met at JPL at 8am. I had posted the ride to Midnight Ridazz so we did not know who would show up. Our original plan was for Jack to ride road pulling the bikes with some sort of Rock Lobster rack, but that didn't work out and Jack flaked on us. Now Max is no slack rider, but he hasn't been riding too much beyond commuting. Could he take 50 pounds of mountain bikes on the Big Dummy? Yes he can. With Michael on as support Max did an epic road ride with 50 pounds of cargo.


Brian and I set off on foot along the Arroyo-Seco to the Gabrielino. It's a beautiful trail with stream crossings, boulders, canyons with full cover and exposed, dry ridges. I love it. Below Brian is picking some wild berries as the mountains we are about to run up loom in the distance. Yes, he is wearing his bike helmet. Said it was the easiest way to carry it.


Some switchbacks that we would soon be descending down.


Brian and I ran together the first 5 or so miles and then inevitably he dropped me. I ran almost all of the first 9 miles to Switzer Falls. There I begged some picnicing folk for water as I had run out about 45 minutes previous. The last 4 miles up were quite difficult, as expected. I hiked most of this section at a good clip and ended up at the top only 30 minutes or so after Brian; about four hours after we set off.


Brutal blister. I also rolled my foot as I was wearing some light weight running shoes. Duh.


Gabrielino is not an easy trail to ride down. For a number of miles the trail is between 1 or 2 feet wide with the mountain to one side and a huge drop to the other. Some sections are a little washed out (I like to bunnyhop them cause it's easier than having to unclip and get off your bike).

We were back and forth with a group of three mountain bikers who were all really cool. They told us about a sweet swimming hole only a 1/4 mile off the main trail.


Brian and I were super tired and it was a tough decision. I think we made the right one. Cold cold water is a great remedy for aching muscles.


After 8 hours in the wilderness (just like a 9-5, only fun) we headed over to Pasadena to take the Gold Line to Chinatown. From here I had a short ride home and Brian, after buying some durian fruit, took the train back to El Segundo.


Max getting his well-deserved AdventureSnore.

Next time: I'd like to film this. It is so gorgeous back there and so accessible from Los Angeles. In my mind Sunday was a beautiful combination of DIY, adventure and wtf? Sure, there is an environmental component, but that is a secondary benefit to some friends getting together and thinking about new ways of exploring an amazing area and what is possible.

03 July 2008

Happy 50th Birthday Grand Tour

Finally an adventure! I've been so caught up in working a lot and these other non-adventure projects that I almost didn't do this one. Phew. I kind of love that feeling when you are getting your stuff ready and the rational part of your brain chimes in and is all, 'Are you sure this is a good idea? Don't you think sleeping in your bed would be nice?'

I rolled out of the house at about 930pm heading for Malibu, 30 miles west and north, to the 50th anniversary of the Grand Tour. It's a city traverse for the first 15 and then 15 up the famous PCH. I was counting the number of Bentleys that I saw and then lost track when I got passed by a Rolls Royce. Oh Southern California why are you so crazy?

Where to sleep? Stupid sprinklers. I climbed over a half broken-down fence (still in spandex, mind you) into a nursery (the kind with trees, not children) and find a little covered area with hay on the ground. Score. I get out my mat and sleeping bag, change into shorts, eat my burritos and am horizontal by 1230am. The plan was to meet up with Brian in the am after he rode up from El Segundo, but my stupid nextel broke the day before and I couldn't see his call nor his number to call him. I roll out of 'bed' around 530 to the sounds of bike shoes clicking in and out, get checked in, hide my bag and am off.

In 2005 I rode the triple century and in 2006 I rode the double with Brian and Jack. It's a classic route, that I enjoyed this time more than any previous. It meanders up the coast, cuts inland back through Westlake and then over to Ojai before hitting the coast again at Carpinteria where the double heads south.

I thought I was leaving on time, but apparently all those riders I saw were doing the double metric (I was wearing my Paris-Brest-Paris jersey, figuring it was appropriate because I slept outside the night before the ride). I didn't really see more than a few double riders till about 80 miles in. Then caught some more at lunch, mile 114. Still, I rode alone, which was nice. A double is long enough where I don't spend much time worrying about all the other stuff I have to do. When I do 20 or 30 miles in the morning during the week, I am always thinking about what I have to do when I get home. Not on a double. It is like a vacation from myself.

I did ride about 10 miles with a 52 year old guy riding a Soma fixed gear. He bike commutes 18 miles each way to work. Total bad ass. The 50 miles down the coast to end the ride were beautiful in the stereotypical sunset coastal breeze California kind of way. After huffing and puffing about there being not a single vegetarian item at the post-ride BBQ (okay, there was plain white bread) I rode the 15 miles into Santa Monica and went to Whole Foods. A good day. I got in 250 miles in 24 hours toward my 1000 miles in 4 weeks goal I set. And I got to sleep outside, which always makes anything you do more fun.

30 June 2008

Consume Less

How can I save money?
What can I do about global warming?
How can I lose weight?
How can I work less often?
What can I do about sweatshops?
How can I spend more time with friends and family?
How can I focus on my spiritual health?
How can I get rid of my credit card debt?
How can I make moving easier?
How can I make more room in my house?
Where can I find more time to train?
How can I become a better cyclist?
How can I boycott big oil companies?
How can I show my disdain for global capitalism?


I try really hard on my blog to not sound preachy. That is harder than it sounds when you are a bike-riding vegan. Whenever transportation or eating, two huge topics with plenty of off-shoots, come up, anything a vegan or a bike rider says can easily be construed as trying to convince others to be more like us. I know this because plenty of vegans and commuters are rather annoying. But I do share their energy and conviction. So what to do? I strive to lead by example. Can you be a vegan athlete? Can you live in LA without a car? Well, I am doing what I can.

I cannot stop thinking about consumption (discussed previously). I worry that the simpler an argument becomes, the closer it is to being a wing-nut theory. I hate to throw anything away. When something I own breaks and I have to replace it, I fret over it for days. Even weeks. But the more I think about it, the more consumption relates to so many things we (well, many of us) care about. Global warming is an obvious example. Just buy less stuff. Cycling is less obvious. But nothing will make you a better cyclist than just riding more. Yes, you do have to have a functional bike and occasionally replace tires and tubes. For most of us though 11-speed cassettes are not going to improve our cycling.

I (right now anyway) have no interest in living off of the land in Humbolt County or Hawaii or somewhere so is it hypocritical that I own anything? I saw Derrick Jensen speak last year and he said 'We are mammals, we consume. Zero consumption is not the goal.'
I agree. Just consume less. What do you think?

22 June 2008

The Great Divide (race)

In Fall of 2006 my good friend Steevo and I set off to ride the Great Divide, a 2500-mile, 85% off-road mountain bike route along the Continental Divide from Canada to Mexico. Steevo's photos from his blog are here and here. I only managed to get one post up here.

The key word is 'ride'. We tried to do it in 29 days and fell a couple hundred miles short of official completion. But anything you can ride you can race. The Great Divide Race started in 2004. It follows the maps from Adventure Cycling exactly. There is no support, no entry fee and no prizes. Pretty cool. (before the official race John Stamstad, who I have written about previously blazed the course in 19 days on his own).
But the route was extended north into Canada so....see where this is going? Long story short, one of the previous years' winners, Matt Lee, suggested that the race also be extended. The GDR race organizer (apparently) did not think this was a good idea. So Matt started his own race: Tour Divide. And they are both happening at the same time right now. If useful website is a gauge to measure a race, then Tour Divide wins hands down. They have real-time GPS on every racer. I'll be keeping up on this and thinking about what it must be like to ride over a hundred miles a day, off-road, with no support for over two weeks.

19 June 2008

Punch fear in the face

Two great articles came out this week addressing fear and cycling.:
De-car-ing: The idea of cars as safety devices is a post in the LA Times 'environmental' blog, Emerald City. She answers the questions: Why do we feel so safe in our cars? Is cycling in the street dangerous? It's written well and will help with those inevitable conversations with co-workers.
The second is from the legendary Bike Snob NYC, Get Over It: Surmounting the Obstacles to Cycling. If you've never read Bike Snob NYC let me be the first to say: Welcome to the internet. A lot of people have a lot to say. But most people who you would like to hear a lot from, say very little. Then there is Bike Snob NYC. He's like the smartest person you know combined with the funniest person you know and, this is the best part, bothers to share both qualities with everyone else. Usually there is an indirect relationship with the amount of useless information you know about bicycles and sense of humor but thankfully there are exceptions.

Lastly, here are my two favorite quotes that mention getting punched in the face:
'Never buy a bike from someone you can't punch in the face.' -A disgruntled eBay auction winner
'Everyone has a plan till you get punched in the face.' -Mike Tyson

16 June 2008

Who says you have to eat meat to be a successful athlete?

Who says you have to eat meat to be a successful athlete?

Wow. ESPN. AND it is a good article complete with a suggested reading list. Have we reached a new level? I want to personally thank the vegan who sat next to Tony Gonzalez on that flight and talked to him about his diet. And Prince Fielder's wife for reading Skinny Bitch. What I like about this articles is that it captures the 'lifestyle' idea that many of us embrace, without 'wearing it on our arm' as Mac Danzig says. Also profiled are Scott Jurek the ultra-runner and Pat Neshek, a pitcher in the Majors.

What is Vegan Treats?

This bakery makes delicious, moist donuts, french pastries and brownies. It also makes Matt fat whenever he visits Bethlehem, Pennsylvania.

If you guessed Vegan Treats you are correct. Obsessed with media like I am? Here is Danielle on MyFox Philadelphia (and the story is actually positive. From Fox!). Or an article in the Washington Post.





10 June 2008

Dropping Bombs on Your Moms


And I am going to link Budge again because he has lots of photos up from our little weekend get together.
Feel it!

09 June 2008

When BMXers get married

This is what they do at BBQ's.





And Race Across America started yesterday. Imagine: 300+ miles a day for 9 or 10 days. I can't seem to wrap my mind around that.
30 centuries
15 double centuries
6 Furnace Creek 508's
1 sore ass?

08 June 2008

Lots of chicks at our BBQ


05 June 2008

Faith in Vagueness

My friend Lisa Auerbach who writes the Little Blog of Revolutionary Knitting has an art show up called The Tract House. Ever see those little religious pamphlets that god-types like to leave on buses, in restaurants, in restrooms and other places for the curious to pick up and page through? Lisa, being the smart and smart-ass person she is thought, why should the religious-right have a stranglehold on tiny pamphlets as a means of spreading ideology? She contacted some equally smart and smart-ass friends to write them for her, with no limitations. I wrote one that does not translate well in pdf or any other electronic means of communication (cause it's all about little pamphlets!), but Morgan wrote a kick-ass one called Faith in Vagueness. Enjoy.

Have faith in vagueness. Live with life held in only the broadest of strokes, to be
filled in as it comes into focus. Leaving space for co-incidences will naturally lead
to co-incidences; every falling leaf must fall somewhere, every space left for chance
will meet with chance. Vagueness is beauty. The vaguest of outlines happily leads
to a missed bus, an accidental walk home
late at night; an impressionistic plan will
be achieved, albeit through necessarily
meandering means.

Distrust of vagueness easily falls into
facile stagnation. Where is the beauty in a
planned adventure? In a deliberate conversation?
Many things never happen because
practicality gets in the way. But they may
just work out, if you launch yourself into them with optimism and faith that your
vagueness will solidify in the process.
With this in mind, co-incidences are no longer surprising, but expected. With so
many unconnected possibilities, it is inevitable that some will be fulfilled. The more
you have trust in chance, the more you are able to trust chance. Indeed, the more
you have trust in chance, the more attuned you will be to co-incidences you would
otherwise have been blind to.

So: of course the guy sat next to you on the bus that you struck up conversation
with is best friends with a friend of yours, living 5000 miles away. Of course one of
your best friends runs into another friend in a distant city on a train platform. Of
course some friends you haven't seen in months walk into the restaurant you're
eating at, miles from where you live. Of course.

-Morgan Beeby

04 June 2008

When in New York


Tattooed at New York Adorned by Thomas

Coffee at Think

Food at Red Bamboo

Chill at Tompkins Square

27 May 2008

New(s)

In lieu of actual posting, which is often the case when I am away, I have some other writings any readers of this blog should be interested in. The first is an article from the excellent Streetsblog LA. They often cover bicycle topics and their most recent post, How to Make LA Bike-friendly gives good discussion and links to some of LA's movers and shakers.
I have been fighting the incredible urge to post about this since I first heard, but Oprah Going Vegan is too huge. I hope my high school girlfriend has heard the news. She use to make sit through episodes after school AND use to fight with me about not eating meat. What's up now girl!!! That's what I thought.

21 May 2008

Davis double century, Auburn half iron continued

At exactly 546am we rolled up to the start (ride to the ride!). No one in sight. Not one of the 700 people signed up for the ride that starts 'between 515 and 545am'. So we pedal off! Within an hour it was warm. Ride fast before it's too hot or conserve energy? Brian double flats on a pothole in a paceline. A first.

The Davis Double is super well supported with 10 checkpoints in 202 miles, most filled with plenty of fruits and other foods (no clif bars unfortunately). It is inevitable on a 200-mile ride that you will deplete your fluid and energy stores, but we put serious effort into minimizing that (read: we ate and drank a whole lot). There is only about 8,000 feet of elevation gain total, but most of it comes in four climbs. Four climbs in the middle of the day. Four climbs all when the temperature is over 100 degrees. We take our time.

The secret watermelon and vegan burrito stop on the LA to SF drive

When we finish it is still daylight, but unlike Los Angeles the temperature doesn't drop significantly. We eat the free post-ride food, try to find a tool for Brian's bottom bracket and start mentally preparing for Sunday. Back at Janie's house we eat again, load the car and then set off for the 45 minute drive to a relative's place near Auburn.

One of the many (okay, five or so) fixed gears at the double
It's after 11pm when we say goodnight and agree to set our alarms for 445am. The heat changes the fatigue you feel. It's more of a whole body emptiness that you just don't experience from regular fatigue. And you just can't drink enough to replace what you lose. It's a losing battle. I lay down on top of the bed and am asleep before I even think about getting under the covers.

When I awake in the dark I don't feel miserable. Similar to being hungover (it's been awhile so I can't say for sure) in that you are slightly confused and feel like you over it did the night before. Brian looks somewhat normal.

We arrive at 'T2', which is also the finish. We set up our running stuff, load our swim stuff into backpacks, set up our bikes and ride to 'T1'. Six miles, mostly downhill. Ouch. Legs are unhappy. I'm still a little dazed, but the sun is up, people are about and excited. We check-in, set up our bikes in 'T1' and start to dress for the swim. Note to Jan Ulrich-types who like to gain weight in the off-season: If your wetsuit is tight at 'race weight', you are going to be unhappy at ten pounds over. Note to slackers: It's embarrassing to be running down the boat launch as the race is starting.

I have no shame in admitting that I was thinking about quitting before I reached the first buoy. I was struggling to breathe, my body was aching and I was cramping. Why is this so bad? Just kept swimming. Was focusing on my fish-like swimming and was getting nauseous. Can fish vomit in their mouth?

Back at my bike taking off my wetsuit was so glorious I decided to sit down and revel in the wetsuit-free glory. Then I tried to ride my bike up some hills and my legs hated me possibly more than my stomach. It wasn't that miserable feeling you get on super long or hot rides where you just want it to end. It was different. More of a disconnected feeling where your shortcomings seem somehow to be normal. The odd thing was that I didn't care that much. Did I accept it on some level or was I too phased to care? I ate a banana. Drank some electrolyte stuff. And some water. And got passed and passed and passed. Aren't I suppose to be the one doing the passing on this race? No top fifteen percent bike split this year! Hills are hard when you are tired.

I told myself I wasn't even going to start the run. Why bother? But when I saw my shoes I thought, 'I already paid and my shoes are already here...' and went out. Wow. Stomach is super unhappy. What's that weird feeling? Oh yeah, having to pee. Sort of. I think the thick liquid that came out was urine (only a slight exaggeration). At the first aid station I sit in the shade and stare off into space. My stomach is killing me. I add up my calorie consumption for the day: about 800 in five hours of activity. Uh oh. A very fit looking female volunteer probably 1.5x my age, or more, who could easily beat me in any race, says, 'Looks like you didn't do enough hot weather training'. I told her I did plenty the day before. 'Look. See the salt stains on my spandex?' The sun felt like it was melting my skin. Other people looked normal. Are they not human?

The run is two loops from the T2/Finish area. When I finished loop one Brian was there to cheer me on. He had finished already. I stepped off the course, laid down in the shade and didn't get back up. No desire to run. The ground was spinning when I closed my eyes. Am I still edge? Brian brought me some cytomax and water and I put it down. And then some more. And then some more. It's three days later and eating/drinking is only starting to be normal. Wow.

We didn't drive back that night. Even after ten hours of sleep we were both blasted. Unbelievable what the heat can do to you. What an adventure. Looking forward to Vineman in August. Nothing crazy beforehand.

20 May 2008

Davis double, Auburn half-iron

The short:
Sat: Davis double century, 202 miles, in 14 hours and 20 min. Over 100 degrees most of day.
Sun: Auburn half-iron triathlon (swim 1.2 miles, bike 56, run 13.1), DNF after 6 miles of run d/t near heat exhaustion, nausea, dehydration.

The long:
I now fully understand what it is like to be dehydrated. Am also now familiar with heat exhaustion, nausea and intense cramping. This is good. Only those who risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go? My approach to whatever you call the things I do (adventure? fun? extreme? athletic?) has been simple. If it's there and has a draw, do it. A little naivety is healthy. Curiosity is a sign of intelligence. You won't know until you try. Et Cetera.
I did the Auburn 'World's Toughest Half Iron' in 2006 (second triathlon ever) and in 2007 (third triathlon) . Both years I had a blast and actually placed in my age-group. This year the Davis Double Century happened to be the day before. Why not? Bike touring is all about waking up after a hard day of riding and then riding again. And on PBP I rode 325 miles in one day, slept 7 hours, then rode another 200 plus without much problem. And it's not like I'd drive all the way up there just to do the double, so why not save gas and do both at once. I talked to Brian 'Emperor Moth' Davidson and he didn't flinch (note to potential bad-asses: If you want to look badass for some crazy thing you are doing don't invite the strongest athlete you know to come along).

What we did not calculate was the heat. Over 100 degrees both days. 109 at one point on the double on Saturday. That's hot. About how hot it was on the drive up (and back) in the car with no AC. That probably did not help our preparation (but runs up quite a few punk points). But we did all we could and Davis is a great bicycle city to do it in. We park the car at our friend's house. Ride half mile to bike shop. Closed. Ride around corner to other bike shop. Score. Ride half mile to ride check-in. Ride half mile to a Co-op. For real. Got to love that shit. We ate a nice meal (you can make fun of raw-foodists all you want till they make you the most kick-ass salad you've ever had). Asleep by 10-ish for the 5am wake-up call (from Nextel).

(to be continued manana)

15 May 2008

Don't invite the FBI to your vegan potluck

I know it is that time of year and everyone is all stoked on Spring and being vegan and spreading the love, but you have to be sure not to invite the FBI. I know you want as many people as possible and that your hummus is bangin and that you have just the right flyer to convert each and every person to veganism. But remember, the FBI wants to come to your vegan potluck. A vegan FBI agent is still an FBI agent.